Last week I talked about addressing what might be weighing you down in my blog. I woke up this morning thinking about that very thing this morning. You know those thoughts where once you start thinking about them you either get mad, sad or just keep repeating an argument in your head.
In my case, it was about a the feeling of being taken advantage of at work. As much as I tried to get it out of my head, I mean it happened months and months ago but I was really never able to get over it. It got me thinking, how do you let it go? I mean you can keep dwelling on a topic or release it but how do you do that?
Identify the real issue
In this case, I just felt tricked into accepting a position that actually cost me money vs. being a promotion. Maybe in your case it was a friend that slighted you, or a spouse that didn’t notice something. Maybe it is something more serious that caused physical pain vs. mental anguish. What ever it is, understanding the real issue behind the pain is also important to figure out. When you identify the issue behind the issue, you can then work on the next step.
Flip the Script
Once you identify the pain, the next step is to try and flip that conversation in your head. Was the issue that was bugging me something that made me regret or wish I hadn’t taken the promotion? In looking at it from all sides, I realize that the reason that I agreed to think about the promotion was that I saw a better way to lead my team. If I wasn’t the manager, then it would be harder to make changes. I also realized that in my case, their was a bigger picture that my manager was trying to finesse.
Until you take a step back, you get so focused on how you are feeling that it is hard to see that bigger picture. You never know what others are going through or if you caught them on a bad day. What happened to you may never have been about you but the person that hurt you. All I know is that in order to get that negative loop out of your head, you need to replace it with something else.
Look For The Positive
Everything that comes are way usually provides a lesson. They say that God will never put something on you that you can’t handle. Sometimes looking for that positive is hard when it comes to the more serious wrongs, death of a loved one, illnesses…
But there is always blue sky above the clouds, and there are usually small glimmers of love, friendship, the real reason you were put on this path and the problems you can help solve for others. Flipping the script to something else seems to help.
Change your thoughts from “I have to” to “I get to”…
In some cases, when you start to think about things, maybe it is something you dread…by saying “I get to” or “I choose to” it helps to express gratitude for what you do have and what might have not happened if you didn’t overcome this challenge. Maybe it is looking up and realizing the support and love of your family and friends or that door that closed is just something bigger telling you that there is a better path to be on.
Let it go and mean it. Once you do this, you will feel lighter. You may notice once you let it go all the ways that it was clouding your vision or holding you back. Maybe it was effecting your health in a negative way? It was adding extra stress in your life that was causing you to not meet your goals. Let it go and feel the other areas and things in your life lift you up.
Mindset transformation is all about doing what is best for you. If you are not at your best, how can you help others? Every day, look for that something special or positive or just notice the light, flowers, love around you. It is there, you just have to be present enough to see it. The steps to aging better and being well is letting go of those things that weigh you down.
For me, the stress caused me to eat my feelings and by letting go, it also allowed my body to start releasing the weight. I had help in the nutritional products that I was putting in my body but sometimes mind over matter is that last step in the process.
What can you let go of?
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